A story of loss and lesson
    January 14 2014 by K.J. Nally, Guest Column

    Nine weeks went by, and I was feeling good. We joked that maybe there wasn’t a baby in my “belly” because I didn’t feel pregnant. Sure I was tired and ate everything in sight, but I felt great. As we sat in the room waiting for the doctor, we gave each other a high five and then thanked God for His perfect work. This was God’s little one, entrusted to us to raise him to be a worshiper of God.
     
    My heart was beating so fast in the doctor’s office. I thought when the nurse took my blood pressure she was going to be alarmed that it was so high (because of my anticipation). That day we would meet our first baby. We were so excited. The doctor came in and talked for a while about what to expect and hospital protocol … then it was time for “Baby’s First Picture.”
     
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    K.J. Nally

    Silence. This isn’t what an ultrasound was supposed to look like, I thought. Where was my baby? The picture was white with only a tiny black circle. No heart beat. No baby. The doctor didn’t need to say anything. We knew, and our hearts broke.
     
    The doctor left the room after a short explanation of what would happen over the next few days. She told me not to blame myself. But, in that moment as my world spun out of control I couldn’t stop the thoughts. I wept in my husband’s arms. Slowly I met his gaze and said, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” He knew what I meant and gently held me. “Don’t you dare go there,” he warned. “Don’t you dare take credit for what God is doing.” I knew the truth … God was in control, He was faithful and He was good. But, could I believe that in this moment?
     
    Sunday, Oct. 2, 2011, would have been our little baby’s due date. When we lost our baby, we cried to the point of exhaustion. It was so sweet falling in love with our first child. In His kindness, the Lord taught me many lessons during this terrible trial, one lesson I will never forget.
     
    In my prayer journal, the day after we lost our baby, I wrote, “Lord, I can’t help but think, as Dustin said to me yesterday that this pain we feel is small in comparison to the pain you feel daily. Daily watching men and women die, never meeting their Father. Never getting to be born as a new man into Your family.
     
    Never feeling the embrace of their Father’s love. Never being named … child of God. And Lord … that is for eternity.” God loves us. How His heart breaks when people die before knowing their Father, miscarried for eternity.
     
    As we celebrate the sanctity of life, being great champions for the cause of babies is gallant, but we must not forget why life is something worth fighting for. Our hearts must cling to this one great lesson: Our Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ has called us to be His ambassadors, sharing the truth of the gospel with all people, so they can know their Father’s love – because every life is precious to the Father.
     
    (EDITOR’S NOTE – K.J. Nally writes and teaches about God, relationships and life. For more biblical topics visit AbsorbedinHim.com.)
    1/14/2014 10:44:11 AM by K.J. Nally, Guest Column | with 0 comments
    Filed under: Sanctity of Life




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